Actual quotes from members of the Something Awful forums

I work in an office that likes to eat. There is always some kind of food in the kitchen, and my desk is literally across the hall from said feeding ground. Today there was a gigantic box of cookies (like, wholesale sized) and a huge bowl of candy. I was depressed over some money issues that I have no control over (I'm waiting to hear back on some scholarships/grants that will determine how the next 4 years of my life go, or don't go), and then before I knew it I'd eaten so much sugar my tongue hurt.